Restrictive eating is often misunderstood. In a culture that praises willpower, discipline, and “clean” eating, the warning signs of a deeper psychological struggle can easily go unnoticed. But beneath the surface of counting calories, cutting out food groups, or obsessing over “healthy choices” is often a more complex story—one rooted in control, perfectionism, and emotional overregulation.
For individuals who engage in restrictive eating, food is not just about nutrition or weight. It becomes a way to manage anxiety, assert control, and create a sense of safety in an unpredictable world. While the behavior may begin with good intentions, over time it can evolve into a rigid, isolating, and deeply distressing cycle.
Radically Open Dialectical Behavior Therapy (RO DBT) is an innovative treatment that targets the personality style often underlying restrictive eating: overcontrol. If you or someone you care about is struggling with restrictive eating, understanding the role of overcontrol may be the missing piece—and RO DBT may offer a meaningful path forward.
What Is Restrictive Eating?
Restrictive eating involves intentionally limiting food intake, often in ways that go beyond nutritional needs or medical necessity. This might include:
- Skipping meals or eating very small portions
- Cutting out entire food groups without medical reasons
- Following highly rigid food rules
- Avoiding social situations involving food
- Obsessing over “good” versus “bad” foods
Unlike occasional dieting or mindful eating, restrictive eating is characterized by rigidity, anxiety, and an intense preoccupation with food, body image, or self-control. Over time, it can lead to physical health issues, emotional distress, and interference in daily life.
Importantly, restrictive eating doesn’t always result in dramatic weight loss—and individuals struggling with it may appear outwardly “functioning.” Many are high achievers, perfectionists, or people who are praised for their discipline, making the underlying distress even harder to detect.
The Psychology of Control and Perfectionism
Restrictive eating is often a symptom—not the root cause. Behind the food rules and calorie counting is frequently a need for control, order, and emotional safety.
People who engage in restrictive eating may:
- Feel uncomfortable with uncertainty or spontaneity
- Struggle to express emotions
- Hold themselves to impossibly high standards
- Fear being “too much” or “not enough”
- Seek validation through achievement or self-denial
These traits align closely with a personality style known as overcontrol—a core focus of RO DBT.
Understanding Overcontrol
Overcontrol is a biologically-based temperament characterized by high self-discipline, emotional inhibition, perfectionism, and a strong need for structure. People with overcontrolled traits often appear composed, conscientious, and high-performing. But internally, they may feel lonely, anxious, or emotionally numb.
In the context of restrictive eating, overcontrol often drives behaviors like:
- Avoiding hunger cues
- Sticking to rigid food schedules or plans
- Feeling guilty or anxious when deviating from rules
- Using food restriction as a way to manage uncomfortable emotions
- Viewing success through the lens of self-denial or restraint
This dynamic can be incredibly difficult to shift—because the behaviors are not just about food, but about managing emotional vulnerability and self-worth.
How RO DBT Helps with Restrictive Eating
Radically Open DBT was specifically developed for individuals whose problems stem from too much control rather than too little. While traditional DBT targets emotional dysregulation and impulsivity, RO DBT addresses excessive self-restraint, perfectionism, and social isolation.
Here’s how RO DBT supports individuals struggling with restrictive eating.
Targeting Emotional Overinhibition
Many individuals with restrictive eating habits have difficulty identifying or expressing emotions. RO DBT helps build awareness of emotional experiences and teaches skills to express those emotions in ways that are authentic and socially effective. Over time, this reduces the reliance on food rules to cope with internal discomfort.
Building Psychological Flexibility
Restrictive eating often thrives in rigidity: only eating at certain times, only eating certain foods, or avoiding anything “unplanned.” RO DBT promotes psychological flexibility—the ability to tolerate uncertainty, take risks, and adapt. This flexibility allows individuals to gradually loosen their grip on food rules and make choices based on values rather than fear.
Reducing Social Isolation
Many people with restrictive eating habits withdraw from social situations involving food. RO DBT includes social signaling training, helping individuals re-engage with others, navigate shared meals, and develop healthier, more reciprocal relationships. Connection is a key protective factor in recovery.
Reframing Identity
In overcontrolled individuals, identity is often tied to being disciplined, self-controlled, or “perfect.” RO DBT encourages clients to develop a broader, more flexible sense of self—one that includes spontaneity, vulnerability, and self-compassion. This shift in identity makes it easier to move away from restrictive eating as a source of self-worth.
Addressing the Fear of Losing Control
A major fear for many individuals is that letting go of restrictive eating means losing control entirely. RO DBT works gently to challenge this black-and-white thinking. Clients learn that openness does not mean chaos, and flexibility does not mean failure. Instead, it offers freedom, balance, and room for joy.
Beyond Food: The Emotional Landscape of Recovery
RO DBT understands that recovery from restrictive eating is not just about “eating more.” It’s about addressing the emotional terrain that made restriction feel necessary in the first place. This includes:
- Allowing space for grief, sadness, anger, and joy
- Letting go of rigid ideals of perfection
- Creating space for authentic connection
- Finding new ways to feel safe, valued, and whole
By targeting overcontrol directly, RO DBT goes beyond symptom management and supports deep, lasting change.
Is RO DBT Right for You?
If you struggle with restrictive eating and resonate with words like disciplined, perfectionist, anxious, or emotionally reserved, you may be a good candidate for RO DBT. Whether you’ve tried other forms of therapy or this is your first step, RO DBT offers a unique and effective approach for those whose challenges stem not from a lack of control—but from too much.
At its heart, RO DBT is about opening up—to yourself, to others, and to the full range of human experience. Recovery is not about becoming someone else. It’s about reclaiming the parts of yourself that have been buried beneath rules, fear, and silence.
Get Started
At Abri Radically Open DBT, we specialize in helping individuals navigate the complex intersection of restrictive eating, emotional overcontrol, and perfectionism. Our team is trained in RO DBT and committed to supporting you in a compassionate, individualized, and evidence-based way.
If you’re tired of living under the pressure of control, of making choices based on fear, or of missing out on connection and joy, there is another way forward.
Q&A: Understanding Restrictive Eating
What is restrictive eating?
Restrictive eating involves intentionally limiting food intake in a way that is rigid, obsessive, or emotionally driven. It may include skipping meals, avoiding entire food groups, eating only at certain times, or following strict rules. While it can appear as “healthy” on the surface, restrictive eating is often rooted in control, anxiety, and perfectionism.
How to recover from restrictive eating?
Recovery involves gradually increasing food variety and intake, challenging rigid food rules, and addressing the underlying emotional and psychological factors driving the behavior. Therapy, especially approaches like RO DBT that target overcontrol, can be essential. Support from dietitians, medical professionals, and loved ones also plays a key role.
Why do people restrict eating?
People may restrict eating as a way to cope with anxiety, manage emotions, assert control, or strive for perfection. For those with overcontrolled personality styles, restriction can provide a sense of order or identity. However, this coping strategy often becomes harmful over time and may lead to physical and emotional consequences.
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